What if...

I'm gonna be honest: When my body isn't functioning well, I'm super emotional or indulging in habits I reject, I'm usually dissociating from any and all of it, abandoning myself just as one might abandon a small child that's "too much."

And honestly, I get it! It's a lot, in the midst of our insanely hectic, demanding, traumatized world, to try and make sure a small human is always, and constantly, seen, cared for, understood, heard. It's impossible, actually. So. This is not to throw shade on my parents, or any others. It's merely an observation, and may help us to understand why we DO self-abandon: It's a lot to be carrying that pain, or discomfort, whichever kind it is. And also that there is always a reason for the pain we feel.

What I would like to invite is the idea that, despite - or underneath - all this, we're really meant to feel good in our bodies. That life didn't intend for us to feel shitty all the time, to be sick, or feel like we're not in charge of our own inner world.

Now, I know many of us don't have that privilege - quite a few of us are even born with some kind of dis-ease, which tells us a lot about generational trauma, if you ask me. But that's for a different story. What I'm starting to believe (and I do realize I'm not the first one to do so, don't worry ;)) is that, naturally, we're supposed to feel good, be healthy - physically, mentally, emotionally. The fact that more and more people aren't - well... again, this will be a different story.

I know for myself that, sometimes - okay, let's be honest: a LOT of the time - it feels like achieving that equilibrium on any of the planes we're experiencing seems friggin impossible. Even after years of dabbling and deep-diving in various fields of personal development, I still often feel like I don't even know where to begin. And I think that's partly because of that well-loved onion metaphor: You start peeling on one end, and when you finally feel like you've gotten somewhere, the next layer reveals itself, making us feel like nothing has changed.

The good news is: We DO learn, and evolve, and get to draw on our experiences to work through that next layer. AND: There's SO many amazing practitioners, teachings, techniques and wisdom holders out there who can help us through those layers, and also witness and mirror back our successes when everything feels like it's the same as when we started.

For me, I'm starting to feel like a multi-disciplinary approach is most helpful: A blend of NeuroDynamic Breathwork (as the amazing people at NeuroDynamic Breathwork Online are offering), Shadow Work à la Teal Swan and, of course, TVM to help discover and release trauma stored in the body and the psyche, and develop resiliency and vagal tone to tend to future obstacles with a more regulated nervous system. Music, dance and pleasure work like my beautiful friend Serena Amoroso is offering - to help myself, and my body remember that those are things I'm SUPPOSED to feel, and be able to hold in my being - and again: TVM helps with this, too, as it strengthens the nervous system to hold ALL kinds of experiences. So many of us - myself included - don't feel safe in themselves when everything seems to be going really well. Messed up, I know - but hey, think of it that way: We get to learn how to FEEL GOOD! Isn't that cool?!

If you feel like you'd like to join me on this path, I'd love to hear from you. I'm developing an approach that blends all those different things that I feel have been helping me make whatever progress I've made so far, and as I'm frantically collecting more knowledge on a weekly basis, there's bound to be more added to that. I call it "The MOMO Method", because at the base of all of it is listening: What's needed, and helpful, right now? And sometimes that is: Absolutely nothing. And that's okay, and beautiful, and exactly right.

So, you know where to find me, when and if you're ready for a little something. I'm looking forward to hear from you, with love.

PS: I wonder: What do you do when something within yourself - be that on the physical, the mental or the emotional plane - doesn't "work" the way you'd like it to? Share in the comments!